Friday, May 8, 2009

Freakin' Funny Friday ~ You Too!


It's Friday. The weekend is almost here! It's time for some fun. It's time for Freakin' Funny Friday. It's been a long week and I know you're ready to enjoy the weekend. Let me help you with that.

So I overslept this morning and I was going to be late for work so I had to zap-fry my pop-tart on high for 3 seconds in the microwave. I didn't have time to remove the pastry from its pouch and insert it vertically into my toaster, that would have taken way too long. As I was driving to work I saw two log trucks pass each other on the highway and I thought it was a little odd. I knew I was going to be late for work so I stopped by the donut shop. I figured my boss wouldn't be so upset if I brought donuts. So I bought two boxen of donuts. I got to work and saw one of my co-workers. I said "Hi Carolyn" She said "It's Caroline, Dan, it's Caroline." I said "It's DHANYE!" My boss was pretty psyched about me bringing in the donuts. He said "Oh good, you got one that has frosting all over the top with sprinkles only on the one side." Work wasn't too bad. I had to ship out ten boxens that all weighed exactly 22lbs. and had a girth of three. Three girth units. I took my lunch break. I had two fig newtons, some cran-chops, and some of that peanut butter and jelly that comes in the same jar and put that in a squeeze bottle. I love that peanut butter and jelly that comes in the same jar. I can't be opening all kinds of jars and cleaning who knows how many knives! I went to dinner with some of my co-workers after work. We went to an IHOP. I don't know what's up with the roof of that place, but you're supposed to eat the pancakes, not worship them. The waitress brought our food and said "Enjoy your meal." so I said "You too!" One of my co-workers was bragging about all of his accomplishments and talking about himself. When he was finished I leaned in and said "I walked on the moon." I had half a cup of ice cream for dessert. After dinner we all left and I told everyone to take luck. When I got home I put my leftovers in my new refridgerator. My new fridge is really cool. It's got an egg area, a meat drawer, and a crisper where I can put crispy things, like potato chips. I decided to unwind by going out on my back porch to relax and yell "HEY! HEEEEEEYYYY! HEY, HEY, HEY! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYY! HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY!"

Okay, some of you are probably completely lost right now while others of you completely understood everything I just said in that last paragraph. That little story you read just now is a mish-mash of references to the comedy stylings of one Brian Regan. He is one of THE funniest comedians I have ever seen. Most people have only recently found out about him but I've been following his career since the late 80's. One of my favorite bits that he does is when he talks about the day of the science fair in school and he has nothing prepared so he just puts some dirt in a styrofoam cup and tries to pass it off as his science project. It reminds me of the science fair we had at my school in fifth grade. I didn't know until a few days before the science fair that it was mandatory to do a science project. We were given six weeks to work on it. So my mom drove me to the hobby shop and I bought a plastic replica of a human lung. I put it together and painted it. Then I found some information on lungs in my science text book (this was before the internet) and wrote it down on that big piece of poster board that you use to stand up behind your project. I got to the fair and there was one kid who built a machine that blows bubbles, another kid was hatching a baby chick, and of course there was the kid with the volcano. And then me with my sad little plastic lung. I think the parents had a hand in helping out the other kids, more or less. Probably more if not completely. Needless to say I didn't win first place.

The thing I like about Brian Regan is that most people can relate to the things he talks about. Plus he's pretty clean, the whole family can enjoy his brand of comedy. I have some family members that are pretty conservative and they actually enjoy watching him. I don't mind if a comedian uses bad language now and then but many times some comedians get pretty excessive in thier language to the point where it's not even funny anymore. I think it's funny today when a comedian drops the F-bomb and they think they're being innovative and edgy. "You're breaking some new ground there, Copernicus" as Brian Regan would say. Brian is definitely one of a kind when it comes to what he does. I suggest you check him out. HE'S FUNNY! WATCH HIM! YOU MUST WATCH HIM! I WON'T STOP BADGERING YOU UNTIL YOU DO! Oh wait, what did we talk about yesterday? Oh yea, don't be so pushy. But seriously, I highly recommend him. I'll leave you today some videos of his stand-up. See you next week when we'll start a new week with an "I Hate Monday!" segment. Have a great weekend! Take luck!










Visit the official Brian Regan site here.

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