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Blogity-blah-blah-blog: Story Time Tuesday ~ Return of the Skunk

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Story Time Tuesday ~ Return of the Skunk

This is a sequel to last Tuesday's post so if you haven't read it or if you need a recap, click here. Last week's story happened when I was 13. This week's story happened only a little over a year ago.

I woke up one morning to a horrible smell. It smelled like a skunk was cooking garlic and burning tires. I thought a skunk had been run over in the street outside my apartment. It was so bad I couldn't go back to sleep. So I got up took my shower, had breakfast, and got ready for work. I figured it was going to be a normal day, until I got to work.

I saw my co-workers standing around probably talking about the latest episode of LOST. I'm a fan of the show so I thought I would get in on the conversation. A few moments later someone spoke up and said "Whew, I smell skunk." I immediately knew it was me, but I said "It's probably Kathy again" (Names have been changes to protect the innocent). I had heard a story about how Kathy had been skunked about a year earlier. But it didn't take them long to figure out it was me.

I decided to leave and use some vacation time so my co-workers didn't have to suffer. It was so humiliating, but I knew Kathy could sympathize with me. It was kind of nice to have a day off from work, but I knew I had a lot of work to do at home to get rid of the smell. The funny thing is, I didn't smell anything on the way to work. I never would have shown up had I known. But I definitely smelled it when I got home.

I lit all the candles, burned incense, and opened all the windows. This was in February in Pennsylvania by the way. I washed ALL my clothes and doused all of my furniture in Febreeze. Then I did some research online to find better ways to get rid of skunk smell. There were plenty of methods and I went with soaking pieces of paper towel in Pine-Sol and placing them all over the apartment. It seemed to help.

I went to my Bible study later that evening. I wasn't sure if the smell was gone. I wasn't sure if the moment I walked into the room someone would yell "I smell Satan!" and start trying to cast demons out of me. Seriously though, I don't attend that kind of Bible study. No one seemed to notice, and I couldn't smell anything. Then I asked a little while later if anyone smelled skunk. Nobody did. So that made me feel better.

It took months for the smell to leave the house but at least it didn't follow me wherever I went. I still don't know to this day what happened, but I think a skunk may have sprayed in or near the house and the smell traveled through the ventilation and went into every room.

So that's my story. I have a thought though. I wonder if the skunk in this story was the offspring of the skunk in last week's story. If I had never saved the skunk with the bottle on its head, would the event in this story ever have happened? What if I traveled back in time and stopped my thirteen year old self from saving the skunk and then before traveling back to the present I would tell my thirteen year old self to put every last penny I had into a company called Google that would be established a few years later, oh yea, and I would also tell myself "Don't you EVER try to teach your little sister how to golf." (Next week's story, perhaps) Or if I met my thirteen year old self the universe would implode. Either way, the event in this story could have been avoided through the use of time travel.

Alright, I'm done being a dork now. See you tomorrow for Artsy Fartsy Wednesday.

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